Are You playing the Game of your Life?

I have recently Guest posted at Hiten Vyas’ fantastic Blog.

There you will find my thoughts on how You can play the best game of Your Life.Goals

Here’s the link …please enjoy.

If you like it, I will be pleased if you share on your favourite media sites.

Be good to yourself


Life Coach. Listener. Solution Finder.

# In 2013 I will mainly be at my new site. So please join me for coffee, fresh writings, fresh thoughts and ideas at :


6 key questions you can use to open the door to your Self Discovery

We are amazing ‘creatures of The Universe’ with huge potential & extraordinary personal power. For many however, ‘potential’ remains just that and is often not fully discovered & consequently our personal power becomes diminished.

To start opening the door to our self discovery involves the asking of questions. This is the best way to learn & discover things in Life. The better the question…the better the chances of greater discovery.

Can you remember when you were early school age?… question upon question, endless discovery thru books, pictures, stories and the like…..and the excitement of it all!

So here’s where You & I
can revisit that

Not to go back to “school” but to use schooling technique to open fresh doors to our Life.

We need to continue to ask questions of others and ourselves in order to grow and develop our excitement of new (self) discovery and to tap into our huge wealth of potential…, is there something stopping us from doing this?

I am still asking myself questions, new questions, better questions for I have potential that I know is still there to be realised…..and ‘potential’ can be a heavy load to carry, so maybe it’s time to unburden oneself.

Now I’m not a “woo woo” type of guy so some of my questions may appear boring however I believe they will allow you to get to the heart of the matter…..that being You…..and that’s pretty important, don’t you think?

Here’s six questions that I have selected(there are more of course)to get you thinking and hopefully build the excitement of exploration & discovery.

  • Will my current ‘choices’ get me to where I want to be… for example…am I doing the things that I should be doing? Am I saying the things that I should be saying? Do I cut corners when I should be doing that little bit extra? Are the people who I spend time with adding value to me? Am I adding to my happiness or subtracting from it?
  • Do I settle for less than I deserve…for example… Is compromise my first action? Can I try a bit harder? I know that I can do better then why aren’t I?
  • Do I consider myself a Victim of circumstance or do I take personal responsibility for my Lifefor example…is Life just happening to me or am I contributing to my Life? Do I let others make choices for me? Do I stand up for what I believe in? Is it someone else’s fault (again)?
  • What are my top 3 personal Values that I want to live my Life bydo you know your Values? * It is worthwhile completing a “Values Checklist” or similar to determine what values drive you…and then live by them otherwise you will likely be in “conflict”. When you are living in harmony with your values you begin to flow rather than trickle thru Life. * Tim Brownson @ A Daring Adventure is among many things an expert on Core Values. You might want to check out some of his posts or even subscribe to his blog.
  • What’s vitally important to me Nowsounds simple however how many times do we pause & determine this? We may be spending time doing ‘stuff’ that bears no resemblance to what is more like our bigger picture. Spending time on the important things rather than just the urgent ones, will pay off big time.
  • How do I really want to live the rest of my Lifeare you accepting of your current circumstances? or do you want to consider a different set of circumstances for your Life? Time is not our friend…Now may be the time to sort this out

Do you see some value here? What questions would you like to use to open the door to your own Self Discovery? I’d love to hear your comments.

Be good to yourselves


#  I’d love you to Visit and “like” my Facebook page

  • You can then take advantage of a Free Coaching session or high value, low cost Virtual Coaching package…just click on the appropriate apps on the page

Please visit me also at:


How to get the best value out of your Mid Life & make it work for you

To play Life at the elite level & enjoy your Life to the full, your ‘game’ needs to be at an elite level. This entails practise & planning regardless at what stage of Life you are in.

In the Mid Life Game, the type of practise will vary & your plans will alter as your game changes from that of earlier years. Nevertheless the “rules” stay the same…..practise & plan.

Sporting analogies aside, the Game of Life is as big as it gets. Having intermediate Goals or plans is wise. Having a longer term Vision for yourself is also wise…..and the time to get that Vision clear  is now drawing closer. This is where a Game Plan can be a valuable resource.

So let’s get cracking!

What one big thing do you want to have achieved by the end of this year? What do you want your Life to be like in say, 10 years?…….so, can you honestly answer these two questions?

This is just a taster to get your thoughts percolating.

(The questions that you will ask will get more interesting, some examples here. Finding the answers, more intriguing & enjoyable, as you move through your Mid Life)

I have recently repainted my Big Picture and tweaked my Game Plan.

The greatest value that I have gained from this exercise, is the amount of feeling that I have included.

Feeling gets the juices flowing, the spine tingling, the blood flowing…….it adds starch to the mixture and makes your Game Plan come alive. I believe that to achieve any goal, it must include a healthy dose of feeling and meaning otherwise motivation to achieve will wane.

Your Goals when entering your forties may well be different to those in your fifties and sixties(more than likely they will be). This is where you have the opportunity to commence your Game Plan and have it working best for you. Getting in ahead before time catches up & passes you by is a big plus…..and we do want to play it Big this year & every year, don’t we?

Setting yourself down and going through a planning session, at least once per year, is a vital ingredient to having a successful Mid Life…..your Game Plan needs to be ready for action. Note: If you don’t know how or where to start, contact me here.

Ask yourself questions, map out your direction for the coming year. Tip… if you are doing this for the first time, I would suggest that you clarify (or create if you haven’t done so) your long term Vision, so that your plan is in sync with your longer term aims.

Your long term Vision/Big Picture may be your ‘pinnacle’. It’s your ideal picture of your Life in 10,20, 30 years from now. Often, this is where our intermediate goals will come from. It’s like working back from the bigger picture and breaking it down into manageable pieces.

As you get into the rhythm of doing your plan each year, also spend time on reviewing the previous year…..are you on track or does some adjustment need to be made? Are you still in alignment with your longer term Vision? Do you need assistance by the way of professional help, Life Coach, mentor for example?

The beauty of having a Game Plan is just that, you have a plan. It can be as broad or as defined as you want…..flexibility is a great thing. Importantly, it’s a blueprint  to allow you to chart your course through your Mid Life and enjoy your journey toward your Big Picture…..and it can be benchmarked to ensure that you are ‘oncourse’ OR a new course needs to be plotted.

Note: This is the way that I look at my Mid Life. It might not be for everyone. It has helped a number of people who I have worked with however you do need to make your own choices. Whatever you choose to do, enjoy your Mid Life and have a destination in mind while journeying.

I’d love you to share your comments below.

Be good to yourselves


# Find out more about me by visiting my :

  • Fabulous “Virtual Coach” page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away
  • Facebook page over there & “like” , if you like

# Click the link below for your complimentary report on a 3 step plan to move you forward when things are on the slide…..

 Traction Control

21 more Self Discovery Questions for the 40+’s……enriching your Mid Life Journey in 2012

I posted 21 Self Discovery Questions to enrich your Mid Life Journey in April of last year & it has been my most viewed to date. Time to add some more “self discovery” & update you to the 2012 version.

Upon reaching the age of 40 & beyond, many will take the time to reflect…..of what has passed and what is to come. You may have a Vision of where your Life is heading OR you may not.

Either way, choices will need to be made, direction to be followed or indeed,sought.

Some questions that you may wish to consider to help you on your way…….

  • Am I happy with the way things are now
  • Will my current ‘choices’ get me to where I want to be
  • Do I commit to taking action to achieve what I really want
  • Are my thoughts helping me
  • Am I aware of any limiting beliefs that will stand in my way
  • Do I make excuses
  • Do I consider myself a Victim of circumstance or do I take personal responsibility for my Life

When one takes full responsibility for their Life, any prior obstacles or distractions are now seen as opportunities, to expand one’s view of Life.

  • Am I motivated to achieve what I want… the fire inside me well fueled
  • Do I appreciate myself
  • Do I need external motivation, a Coach or Mentor
  • What is my source of Inspiration… I have one (or many)
  • What three (3) important achievements will define this current year
  • Do my Values and Beliefs need reviewing…..are they still valid
  • Am I willing to raise the bar on my performance
  • Do I settle for less than I deserve
  • Is my ‘Big Picture’ complete or is it still a work in progress

This is an opportune time to complete your ‘picture’…..sketch it first if you have to and ‘paint’ it in later… least make a start.

  • Do I have support, people who I can rely on
  • Where do I want to be with my Life in 5 years
  • In 10 years time when I Iook back at my achievements, or lack of ‘action’, how will I feel
  • Is there anything stopping me from making progress on my Vision today
  • How will I feel, when my ” dream” comes alive

The Mid Life years are ones to be treasured. With the right thoughts, actions and dreams/visions one can “extend” their mid life beyond the generally accepted norms… time to dwell on ‘old age’ thoughts when you are flourishing in your mid life years…..let’s get to it!

Do you have any Self Discovery questions that you would like to add? If yes, please feel free to use the comments section below….. your contribution will be most appreciated. Please feel free to share this post with your Universe.

Be good to yourselves


The Mid Life Coach

Helping You take the action You need to take.

In 2013 I will also be at my new site. So please join me for coffee, fresh writings, fresh thoughts and ideas at

I help men & women aged 40 & over, make their goals, dreams & longer term Visions for their Life, come true. I want You to be excited about your Life. Contact me Today for your FREE introductory coaching session…

# Find out more about me by visiting my :

  • I’d love you to follow me on Twitter

Living Life Today…….What is “Big” in your Life? Let’s make it Happen

“The Living Life Today series provides a platform to think about your Life as it is Now, enjoy what you have, review and create an even better future for tomorrow”….. Short, sharp & easily digestible.

One of my themes for 2012 is to make it a “Big” year, so I got to thinking…..what is/are the Big things in your Life?

What are the standouts, your ‘badges of honour’?

What grabs you & gets the blood coursing through your veins?

Ask yourself…..what is so important to me to make it so “Big”, that I must pursue it & never give in until it’s achieved?

What sets me alight and makes such a Huge difference in my Life?

Is it Love …..for what you do and/or for someone special?… this Big for you?

Is it family, friends?…..If it is, then Express yourself and play Big with them. In fact, play Big with everbody.

Don’t be small… Big! Review what’s important to you, if it’s not Big enough then work on it and make it bigger……or let it go.

What ever it is that’s “Big” for you, pursue it with a passion, nail it down, don’t let it out of your sight.

  • Please share the “Big” things in your Life or the things that you will make Big, in the comments section below.

be good to yourselves


# Do yourself a favour & check out my fabulous “Virtual Coach” page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away

p.s Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

# I’d love you to share this post with your Universe

# I also hang out @

# Catch me on Linkedin

7 Natural Phenomena that teach us Lessons for Life

Ever wondered what the “Natural world” has in common with us…..”the Human World”?

Plenty!…..”the nature of things”, now wonder where that phrase came from?

I have highlighted in this post, 7 “Natural Phenomena” shared by both the natural & human worlds… least my take on them. (what does this have to do with Life Lessons?…read on)

[Growth, perserverance, family, drought, flood, scarcity,  habitat]

Growth…..stagnation doesn’t work. You stagnate, you die, that’s what happens in Nature. The tree needs to spread it’s roots. The young cub needs to grow up strong so he can lead the pack, because only the strong survive. It also happens to us. Stay in the one “spot” for too long, refusing to move, then you “die” inside & get left behind. We as humans need to grow. Spiritually and knowledgeably & with strength of character.

Lesson…..look to grow in all facets of your Life. Only then will you reach the potential that was designed for you.

Perserverance…..keeping strong and keeping going are ideals that lead to success in Nature and in “our world”. Giving up is not an option. Imagine if the seed “thought” that it would be too hard today to break through the ground and grow skywards or the mother lion didn’t bother to hunt for food for her cubs because the weather was too hot. More than likely it is too hot however food needs to be found, even in the most difficult of times.

Lesson…..We can’t afford to give up…..Life is too prescious and better times beckon, do the ‘hard yards’ when necessary and claim your rewards.

Family….. the bonds with and between the animals & plants are incredibly strong. Strong family ties keep animals safe & plants flourish….. they also keep humans safe and comfortable.

Lesson…..maintain strong family ties, cherish your loved ones and always seek to do the right thing.

Drought….. in the animal and plant world, this can mean devastation. No or little food or water. For us, it can have a flow on effect. Plants which need water as their ‘food’ die, many animals depending on plants then are lacking in a food source. We need water to survive and agriculture and many animals supply our food source. This is complimentary co-existence.

Lesson…..when things ‘dry up’ in your Life, bunker in and look for an anchor point. Go to your back up plan. If you haven’t got one, then create one for safe keeping, because ‘things’ won’t always be as good as they are now.

Flood….. devastating for plant life, animal life and humans. Though after such ‘disaster’ it is a time for re building and re generation for all. “Flood” can also mean too much….

Lesson… may be time to say ‘No’ to the excesses and review your Life. Rebuild, re generate the areas that have either been neglected or have fallen into dissarray.

Scarcity….. Food, water are the two obvious here. Scarcity has had the benefit of producing new ideas. In times of food shortage, “smarter” ways of sourcing food and maintaining supplies had to be invented. Plants adapted, animals adapted & so did we. The scarcity of various resources in our world has meant that “new” ways have to be invented.

Lesson…..scarcity of thinking will bring us undone. It generates a perpetual ‘lack’ in our own resources when in actual fact we have abundant resources at our disposal. We just need to change our thinking.

Habitat….. Do we create our own habitat or does it “form” us? In nature, certain species are particular to certain habitats where they thrive. Take that habitat away and threat becomes real. Humans tend to create their habitats however often this impacts upon nature…..why do we do this? Our habitat in certain locales, is now coming under threat from nature…..role reversal?

Lesson….. adapt to your habitat. Whether that be macro (external environment) or micro (family, friends, acquaintances, people in general). We first need to get our internal habitat in order. Adapt to change when necessary. Once we have our internal habitat sorted, we can then expand into our circle of influence, where we operate on a day to day basis.

Do you have any other “natural phenomena” that can give us Life lessons? Feel free to share.

be good to yourselves


# Find out more about me by visiting my :

  • Fabulous “Virtual Coach” page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away
  • Facebook page over there & “like” , if you like

One Mid Life “Rule” that I keep coming back to…..

If there must be “rules” then I have found this to be the best one to use during my mid life years, please read on & discover what it is…….

I love my “mid life ” years and have written a few posts on this topic. Links to some of these are at the foot of this post if you would like to view/bookmark at your leisure. I have also included this video on some further thoughts of mine regarding this post, hopefully you enjoy…..

When I entered my mid life, I scarcely gave it a thought. Then things started to happen, strange things. I began to question what I was doing, work wise firstly. I began to think about Life more broadly. Maybe my thinking was too narrow to start with. Does this sound familiar?


I had a happy family environment and mostly everything was going along swimmingly…..Life was pretty much “a beach”. However something kept nagging at me…….maybe at you as well?

Your mid life years are to be treasured. They may take some getting used to if “hitting 40” is a big deal to you but it shouldn’t be. I’m not a great one about worrying about the calendar of Life, they are just numbers after all. However, if reaching 40 does impact upon you and give you a “shakeup” then that’s a good thing, isn’t it?

It’s how you ‘feel’ that matters( not the numbers) And it’s this “feeling” that grows as you move through your mid life years (I won’t use  terms such as “getting older” or “aging”). I can’t quite put my finger on it, I guess it differs for all of us however my “feeling” has been one of wanting to achieve more and that I have untapped capabilities. I also feel fit, healthy and virtually indestructible. So this ‘feeling’ about yourself, your attitude toward yourself & Life will always play a large part in how your Life works out.

Be prepared for more learning…..So, how do I learn?

and this leads me to the No1 thing that I am always coming back to…….

The One Golden Rule and I am not a fan of “rules” however this is a good one to have. Asking Questions,  it get you places, it opens doors and is the gateway to further learning & opportunities. I’ll qualify this….. asking yourself questions gets you places…..& then if you run out of questions, go ask ‘the right people’ to get you even further.

This I believe is so important to understand in our mid life, because our questions change. They are different from our earlier years. So we need to up our skills at questioning or maybe we have lost the art of asking the right questions?….. something to consider?

We may have gotten used to accepting how things are and how we think that they are likely to pan out.

Accepting ‘what is’ and ‘what is likely’ is being less of what you can be

You can continue that way and float through Life or you can exercise your ‘power’ by asking. I see the ‘asking’ as rather like a personal challenge. If I can overcome this challenge, then I am better for it.

So, if you want to thrive in your mid life years, just ask yourself “How can I make this better and even more enjoyable?” …….that question may open the floodgates, keep asking, keep refining your questions and the answers will also get better.

There’s a few questions in the links below that may get your thoughts percolating, if they aren’t already.

Now, who’s up for a question or two?

be good to yourselves


p.s Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

# I’d love you to share this post with your Universe

# I also hang out @

# Check out my fabulous Virtual Coach page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away