In my previous post I set out some of the Key Life Questions that I have asked of myself when “doubt” has set in. These questions were asked at various times, over a period of many years(I had plenty of ‘doubt’).
I will now put forward some answers to these questions. You may be wrestling or have wrestled with certain issues in your Life. I hope these questions/answers may in some way be of assistance to you.
”who am I really?”.….this has been my hardest question for many years. The best answer for me is that I am a person capable of learning, passionate about Life and helping people be their ‘best person’. Now in what form that comes in has altered these past few years. Currently and hopefully ongoing as a Life Coach…..that may alter and/or expand in the future…..options open. Some of us determine the answer early on, some of us never will. It’s worth the effort to determine the “real you”.
“what will it take for me to be successful?” …..I am successful according to my own definition of ‘success’. We each determine our own ‘success’ levels.
“what type of work do I want to do?“….. I first asked this question during my school years. Mechanical Engineer was a favourite for a while. Working in a Bank often came to mind, for whatever reason. There were many others that I can’t recall off hand. Suffice to say, I left High School and proceeded to work in a Bank for the next 23 years…..for whatever reason. Sometimes there is no ‘exact science’ to what happens. The journey can unfold in many mysterious ways. My attitude toward “helping” first began in Banking, through the various customer service and people skills that I developed. The “whatever” turned out well.
“would I make a good father?“.….here’s a ‘toughie’. I think you just have to give it your best. No time to slacken. It’s essentially “fulltime”, keep working on it. Show that you care & set a good example. My job as a father continues on…and so does my learning
“will I find Love?”.….Yes! and so can You
“who will remember me?”…..hopefully someone. Seriously though, I determined that it’s what you do, the impressions that you make on people, will be the things worth remembering. I’ve made impressions (good & bad). My personal challenge is to make many favourable ‘impressions’ over the years that I remain on this planet.
“Can I meet or exceed my parents hopes for me?”….. I guess many of us have a feeling(or even a fear for some), that we will not live up to our parents’ expectations. My parents didn’t place any pressure on me in this regard. However I was always wary of doing my best so that I didn’t feel that I let them down. I know that they were proud of me and (are still with me in spirit)
“what one thing will make or break me, will make a big difference in my Life?“….. If it has to be one thing & that is the question afterall, it has to be for me, getting married and raising children. I wouldn’t be half the person without this experience.
“why did I do that?”.….well how many times have I asked this?…..sorry, that’s another question. The answer lies in lessons learnt. And there are plenty of them. I will no doubt continue to ask this question because, I still have lessons to be learned. Life is one Life long learning experience.
“what is the lesson here?“…..at least asking this question is a great answer in itself. Learn from your experiences & keep asking this question.
“how is this going to make a difference?”….. A great question. I use this before committing myself to a course of action. An often asked question during the course of my adult Life. For me, each action that I take must have an attached ‘meaning’.
“how can I change this?“….. things at times go wrong. Poor decisions, poor timing, procrastination. I am guilty. When I am ‘in trouble’, I attempt to pause, step back and then ask myself this question in order to get myself on/ back on track.
“what will inspire my children to look up to me for guidance”…..I still ask myself this. My answer is to simply do everything possible to do my best. Set this example (of always doing your best) and it’s one of the best examples that you can set. This goes in tandem with an attitide of ‘caring & listening’. If you always seek to understand the others’ questions, point of view then you are more than halfway there.
“what will happen if I let my Family down?”.….I dread to think. I believe this starts with yourself. Maintain your own integrity, set standards that are worthy of oneself and of pursuing. I need to feel good/great within myself. If I feel this slipping, then the fear of letting my family down will increase. Look after yourself, be your best friend, then you can look after others.
“I am unhappy, what am I going to do about it?”…..My first crisis with this question ended up in me changing jobs. It got to a stage where the ‘unhappiness’ factor started affecting everything. My suggestion…if you are unhappy, don’t let it percolate, do something about it BEFORE it snowballs into something out of control.
These answers are from my observations of cause & effect and from my own personal experiences. If you can take something from this, then I am happy. If you would like to contribute please use the comments section below. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
be good to yourselves
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I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au please come & visit soon
- Do You Ask Why? (bridgesburning.wordpress.com)
- Giving people answers takes away their power (raphaelsammut.wordpress.com)