Mind your Language, it’s getting a little hot in here

Cryptic, clear, decisive, antagonising, illuminating, happy, loving, caring, tormenting, rude, degrading, false, open,confused,irritating,bland,exciting,colourful,artful,crafted,free

These are just some of the ‘types of language that we use.

The language that we use both written & verbal places us “on show” & determines responses from others (& ourselves).

Is it just me or is the temperature rising? I’m not talking ‘global warming” here, I’m talking language.

In recent times, I have noticed the heat being turned upย  both locally & globally. The language is becoming more intense.

When the heat rises so does the negativity, it seems to me, …….time for a cooler head.

  • Friction causes heat.
  • Friction between parties cause heated language.
  • Easing the friction, eases the heat, eases the negativity.

So how? A Cool head thought….maybe consider the other’s point of view instead of asserting yourself to be “in the right” and acting accordingly?

That’s the main reason for language friction in my opinion i.eย  Someone has to be right & the other has to be wrong. It doesn’t make sense but hey, that’s conflict. There are other reasons of course. That can be debated at some other time. It’s not my intent to labour on that now.

Internal friction(heat causing) distorts the language used,ย  both to ourselves & to others.

I need to take a step back for a moment & review this epiphany…….wow

In other words, conflicting thoughts, irrational thoughts (both causes of internal friction), may cause “your heat” to rise. Now you don’t want to internally combust, do you?

When you “heat up”, negative thoughts come to the surface. Your ”language” skews & this has a flow on effect to the language you use to others. It doesn’t serve you well.

A Cool head thought…take a deep breath, exhale the negativity. Pause, calm down, allow your positive thoughts to percolate & come to the forefront of your thought stream. That’s a good start. When you feel calm(er) then continue your “conversation”. I hope you get my drift.

You cannot operate effectively when your thoughts & language overheat. We see that on the global stage daily. No doubt you see a lot of this locally as well. I tune out to most of this(TV News), that’s my way of handling/ignoring this issue (poor excuse I know). However I am not running away from this….

It still annoys me how people can (miss)treat others via the language that they use. Far greater progress would be made by acknowledging each other’s points of view & working collaboratively to solve our world’s great issues.Not by spending time & energy asserting themselves to be “right”.

Now, enough of the rant. Back to the all important you…….

Remember to mind your language, keep a cool head not a hot one.

This goes for the language that you use to yourself and to others. It is vitally important that your “internal language” is positive. Allows you to grow and have a positive effect on others.

What do you think about the language used in today’s world?

Are you speaking to yourself in a positive way?

Please share your thoughts.

be good to yourselves


p.s Feel free to “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au


14 thoughts on “Mind your Language, it’s getting a little hot in here

  1. Interesting post.

    Language is a very powerful tool – it has the power to connect and disconnect people.

    In my experience, with a hot head, you are disconnected from yourself and not be able to observe the world anymore in an objective way. You see the world through the colored glasses of ‘heat’ and all your language will be ‘heated’.

    I believe the problem is not (only) the language. The language shows just what is playing inside the ‘hot’ head. The problem is the negative state of the ‘heated’ person.

    Put on your cool glasses on, I would recommend for them ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thanks for sharing!

    • Hi Marc,
      Thank you for commenting. Indeed a ‘cool head’ is often what’s needed or ‘cool glasses’ whichever you prefer. More positivity less negativity, more collaboration less right & wrong.
      be good to yourself

  2. Yes David! Love the positive mindset and how the energy affects me as well as others. It can take just a few to start a fire and be that light! ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Very interesting piece; unique style of writing this content. I really like it. It’s expressed through a different perspective.
    I think meditation has become more popular and mainstream as an antidote to our highly reactive patterns. Unfortunately, road rage as one example, and quick tempers, seem to be escalating.
    Your piece is very important and needs to be explored again and again.
    Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

    • Hi Harriet,
      Thank you, I’m glad that you enjoyed the different perspective. I sometimes like to come in from a different angle. We need more cool heads or maybe we need to jump into our chillzone instead of letting the steam build up.
      be good to yourself

    • G’day Justin,
      Yes, it’s often hard to keep ‘our cool”. World leaders could try and work together rather than asserting themselves as being ‘in the right’. Goes both for language & actions. Great to see you again.
      be good to yourself

  4. When I lived in Bangkok (talk about a hot climate!), there was great value placed on having a “cool heart.” The Thai language is geared toward non-confrontation and keeping a comfortable (sabaay) atmosphere. Great post about thinking about the language we use!

    • Thank you Galen,
      We can learn something from their philosophy re language. A hot head wins no friends.
      Don’t be a stranger, look forward to seing you again.
      be good to yourself

  5. Hi David,

    I do agree with you, the language has gotten out of hand. This can change one person at a time if need be.

    As I read this I think about what is going on in D.C. right now. With our leaders in the US, trying to come up with the right answer for troubled times. Do they really care about solving this problem? I believe it is about who is right and who is wrong. They are thinking about who our next leader will be and how they can make other leaders look bad now.

    It all comes down to language and looking a big picture. As you say, when we want to just be right, the heat gets turned up. And the positive goes right out the window.

    Wonderful post that needs attention brought to it. Thank you, David
    Blessing to you,

    • Thank you Debbie,
      This is a wonderful comment. Our political leaders here in Aus are acting like school kids in the school yard. She said, he said etc, No wonder the general public are confused. Anyway, enough of that. If everybody took the time to truly listen with a view to understanding, things may improve. Time for a “cool head” eh?
      be good to yourself

  6. The words we choose to use are so important. I can’t tell you how grateful I am for the “Delete” button, because if I’m not mindful, I can unload on someone who (in my perception) is doing something ridiculous (insert any number of politicians names here____. hahaha ๐Ÿ™‚ ). And I’m fairly confident I’ve almost bitten through my tongue a dozen times or more…but hey, I kept my thoughts to myself, right?

    What I find more difficult is the self talk. I realize that thoughts are just thoughts, and I don’t have to attach to any of them. They’re free to come and go. But it would be lovely if I could (finally) get to the place where I never speak a negative (or heated) word in my own head.

    NOT sure that is completely possible…although I recognize “garbage in/garbage out”, and so try to be careful about what I’m focusing on.

    Even so, certain issues really push my HOT buttons. War, for example. Poverty and homelessness. Casey Anthony getting free ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • Helloooo Grace,
      I understand what you’re saying. All sorts of thoughts come to us. I guess the trick really is to quickly let go of the negative ones or filter them completely. Now, we’re only human. Filtering can work pretty well but stuff will get through. Identify it quickly & then hit “delete”.
      Practising positive thoughts will bring more positives to you. Do it consistentently & the positives will start to outnumber & take over the negatives.
      There are certainly many ‘hot button’ issues out there, I’ve got a few myself. Appreciate your comment.
      be good to yourself

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