How to get unstuck….. a bedtime story that’s a little different

What’s wrong?

Image via Wikipedia

Going nowhere? Frustration setting in?

“You seem to have the key in the lock however the door will not open?”

…….you are stuck….. and probably confused how this has happened…right?

Let’s go back a few steps.

Once upon a time……. there was a point where things were going very well for you.

Unfortunately “this time” became lost. The big bad wolf in the shape of (fuzzy thoughts, distractions, excuses, poor planning) came into the picture. You see, Mr Wolf has some very poor attributes……for example,

• Fear producing
• Procrastination building
• Focus shattering
• mind numbing
• self esteem destroying

Getting “stuck” at various times is normal. The trick is to get unstuck as soon as possible…….otherwise ‘the above’ will devour you courtesy of Mr Wolf.

Firstly, we need to go back to the time when things were going well…….take a few moments and re live this time…..

What were you doing then?  What was working?  What was your attitude? Did you have goals and/or a Game Plan established?…..Yes?…No?…..Let’s review the following key points in order to get unstuck:

*Develop your Game Plan…..know your “moves”. This will allow you to stay in the game and plan your next play without hesitation. Your Game Plan is up to you. It can be as simple or as detailed as you wish. It can be a goal/series of, or a Roadmap. Either way, you have to have one.

*Have an Attitude of Confidence…..this will develop from knowing your game, what your capabilities are and going for the win…..whatever that may be for you…..the more “wins” the greater the confidence

*Bench the “fear”…..it doesn’t deserve to be in your game. More than likely, it is unfounded, it’s certainly unnecessary. There’s a lot of info on Fear out there, however can I suggest you take a look at  this from Tess The Bold Life. It may be very helpful.

*Procrastination is a main “sticker” & can manifest in many ways including the fear of succeeding…..(it’s a subtle one), don’t be afraid of success. Succeeding builds self esteem and focus…..see, you can kill two birds with one stone. Procrastination can also evolve from too many inter weaving thoughts…..get clear, review your Game Plan, simplify if necessary.

*Excuses keep us in a state of denial(and they don’t cut it). Excuses keep us treading water…..they keep us stuck in ‘nowheresville’. Choose to eliminate your excuses & free yourself up. It will also keep the wolf from your door.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on getting “unstuck”. The points I covered here are by no means exhaustive though they are probably the most common. Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

Be good to yourselves

David

*Photo courtesy of Gaspirtz

# Find out more about me by visiting my :

• Fabulous “Virtual Coach” page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away

• Facebook page over there & “like” , if you like

•  website @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

•  Linkedin profile

11 Must Do’s that you can write on the palm of your hand & will make your 2012 a hit

…….or some of them at least will fit on your hand.

This is straight to the point, no mucking around type stuff. You want 2012 to be a standout?…….then please listen up. You need…..

• Plenty of “Yes’s”…..YES I can do that
• No excuses…..don’t try to find or manufacture a reason…..there isn’t one
• Love what you do and love the people whom are in your inner circle
• Always tell the truth…….to yourself
• Be inquisitive…..explore the territory around you (open your eyes a little wider)
• Say No when there’s “too much on your plate”
• Don’t settle for less…..settle for more
• Take the next step to being “outrageous” once in a while (shake out the cobwebs)…..it’s only a step away…..are you game?
• Ask….. so that you can keep moving forward
• Share….. for it will come back to you
• Stick to your Game Plan

be good to yourselves

Image via Wikipedia

David

# Find out more about me by visiting my :

• Fabulous “Virtual Coach” page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away

• Facebook page over there & “like” , if you like

•  website @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

•  Linkedin profile

4 Simple Goal building steps that can be truly Life Changing

I was watching some pidgeons & doves in my backyard this morning scrounging through left over birdseed that I had thrown there. Apart from my usual amusement, it got me thinking ( oh no, not thinking again), about ” searching for crumbs” and scrounging or scraping out an existence, survival if you will.

There are times when we all feel that if we can just survive the day, week , month…..things will turn around. They can, most often with a change in thought process. However one can get stuck in “survival mode” where each day you man up or woman up, at the battlefront.

So, I thought that I would pen down some “survival” type tips that if worked on, will get you off the floor and on the road to “thrival”

Goal Number 1…..Have a Goal that will elevate you above ground. Walking the ground floor or even dwelling in the cellar are not the places to live your Life. It can be a simple goal, in fact the simpler the better. I want you to build some confidence. Just getting a goal established, will give impetus to new thought and new energy and will get you started!

Goal Number 2…..Set a Goal that will build on No 1….a “back to back” goal, a momentum builder. A Goal that will move you up the food chain, little by little if necessary however you must climb. Leave the pain (and comfort) behind. Pain & comfort are strange bed fellows, it’s amazing what hurt people go through to stay comfortable in their own world regardless of how poor a situation it is. So if you attempted Goal No1 and got yourself moving, with a little more effort, Goal No2 can have you elevating yourself even further.

Goal Number 3…..You are now floating above “the crumbs”…..you can see more light, new hope. You are energised and probably in some awe of what you have achieved….. or in shock. You may need a breather and soak in your success, that’s ok, however not for too long, further success awaits. Goal No3 is the goal that will cement your new thought processes. Start to get bold. You have gained some Traction and are stepping forward and building momentum

Whatever goals you selected @ 1&2 go a little bigger. You now have the hang of it, so keep climbing. If you need some support here, contact me & I will help you get there.

Goal Number 4….Develop your sense of direction and Purpose.

What? Where’s Goal No4?…..As a Life Coach, goals are expected to be a large part of what I do. Goals do have a vital part in setting up your Life provided they are established correctly. However I place greater importance on “having a sense of direction and purpose”, so for this post, this is my Goal No 4. This is not to diminish the 3 previous goals. In the situation that I have described for this post, these 3 steps were vital to get you moving from survival up the food chain.

However, be warned, setting and achieving goals may well get you “there” and that’s fine. If later on you find that “there” is not the “there” that you want, then it becomes a bit of a waste. Establish your direction before establishing your goals.

Doing this will then become purposeful, because you know where you are going and it will provide meaning to your Life because you are doing and going to a destination…….rather than “searching for crumbs”.

Does this make some sense? Feel free to comment as always.

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

p.p.s I did a video for this & posted on my FB Page if you would to look

# I’d love you to share this post with your Universe

# I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

# Check out my fabulous Virtual Coach page here where ongoing support and life changing assistance is just a keystroke or two away

Related articles

• Do Goals scare you? (personalpower4me.wordpress.com)

Do Goals scare you?

A recent post by Jonathan Wells really got me thinking…..Hard

I’m a Life Coach yet there ARE times when I have some difficulty getting clear on the process surrounding a particular Goal.

I’ve found that “lack of clarity” is usually the main culprit. 99% of the time, I can amend this when I review the ‘dose of meaning’ that I have attached to my Goal. If the meaning is not strong enough then I need to adjust the goal (or even discard)

There are others who often play a support role in scaring the hell out of me. They are the real ‘bogies’.

* Lack of Focus

# Lack of effective Time Management

* Too many distractions(often subtle)

When I use the term “scared”, I am not implying that I go to water, have a breakdown or anything similar. I am saying that I need to be on my best guard to ensure these ‘bogies” don’t creep in and spoil my game plan.

After all I do follow the Five Effective Steps to Achieving Meaningful Goals which is a blueprint for successful Goal achievement. Suffice to say “stuff” can still happen…..

The two marked * I find, go hand in hand. Subtle distractions sneek up on us. They are often simple things that go a long way into eroding all the good work that we have set up. e.g, ‘phone calls, incoming emails, noise, people

A lot of these are well meaning, well intentioned HOWEVER they interrupt your Focus.

FOCUS or the lack thereof is the dealbreaker. To achieve anything worthwhile one needs to be focussed and have no distractions.

In another of Jonathan’s fine posts, using applied focus in 45 minute bursts will get you on the way to achievement. I believe this to be a very good timeframe to aim at. I’ve used it and it works. It is amazing when you focus without distraction for 45 minutes (or as close as you can, I started @ 30 mins), how much you can achieve.

I am using the same philosophy with two of my current Coaching clients.

# Time Management includes scheduling your ‘focus sessions’. It’s fine to zone in on being focussed however if you don’t schedule then nothing happens.

Time Mangement also includes scheduling your priorities…..the important priorities not just the ‘urgent ones’…..often these urgencies are the ‘subtle distractions’

You see, there is nothing to be scared about.  When you get your priorities right surrounding your Goals…….

* Sufficient Meaning, Focus, Time Management, Avoiding distractions

then you are on your way.

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

check out my Virtual Coach page here

I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au  come & visit soon, there are no “fancies” just solid info on how I can help you

    

How is your Motivation?…..Is it time to turn up the “Volume” in your Life

Has your Life hit a flat spot?

The music in you, the sweet, sweet music has been relegated to a background track…..maybe it’s time to get motivated & turn up the volume a couple of notches.

However before we do…where does it come from, this Motivation?

Is it something learned Or is it something that we all have inside of us?…..

# Hello fellow Life Lovers, what gets you motivated?

Is your motivation spontaneous? Do you have that spontaneity spark? Or is it a motivation built from momentum…..i.e

Do you jump up and into anything and just do it(Nike) without any prompting or do you just keep rolling on with a focus because you have a bigger prize in mind? Either way, having the motivation is good.

Whatever, motivation is a strange beast. How can one person be so motivated yet another can be so un- motivated?

So, where does it come from?

Does your motivation come from within e.g love, passion, committment, family, integrity?

or is it only external e.g wanting/needing a bigger house, sports car, luxury boat, world cruise, glory, front page headlines?

N.B If it’s external only, is there are cost to be paid, in the long term?

ME,  I think if the root of the motivation is internal then the gratification is magnified. Sure, go for the bigger house, luxury boat etc, but not at the cost of…….(fill in the blanks)

Anyway, they are my thoughts, you may have different ideas…..please share in the comments section.

So I’m still puzzled…..  Is it something that we are born with, is it handed down by our parents, peers, heroes OR

is it learned? Now how can you “learn” motivation?

I dig a little deeper. Maybe, just maybe “motivation” is an extra gear in our personal transmissions. When we develop a desire to have/do/feel an experience, a goal or similar, our transmission clicks into another gear, overdrive if you will.

You may be asking if there’s no desire, what happens. ME, I think you stay in “Park” or “Neutral”.

Sub thought…(The desire breeds the motivation. Or does the motivation breed the desire?…Interesting, can you have one without the other or are they inter twined?…it doesn’t matter too much in my book.)

If the ‘desire’, end goal, end game is strong enough, your motivation to achieve same will kick in……

this I believe is part of the learning process.

For those with a low or no desire(s), learning that having a Strong enough desire (integrity based) will fuel your motivation to achieve, can be a breakthrough.

Note that I am using ‘desire’ not ‘need’. I see desire as worthy, coming from a position of strength & integrity and ‘need’ as mainly superficial or short term. Hence the motivation coming from desire is much stronger & is likely to last longer.

Poorly constructed goals ( low desire)will achieve poor results. This will de- motivate rather than motivate.

Strong, meaningful goals(high desire) will fuel your motivation & achieve meaningful results. Your motivation in turn increases as each meaningful result is achieved. Your motivation will then become a habit.

So what do you think?

Do you have the Motivation to step up a notch?

Is your “volume” loud enough?

Are your desires strong enough?

# Make some loud noises in the comments section below, I look forward to hearing from you.

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s  Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

Check out my Virtual Coach page here

I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

6 ways to find a passionate Life

I have adapted this from a previous post of mine. I have amended it somewhat & present it to you in a fresher format. Please read on…….

Living with Passion is mind blowing. There are so many passionate people on this earth yet there are so many more who are either 1. Still seeking the key to a life filled with passion OR 2. Don’t know that a passionate Life can be available to them.

I would like to share with you 6 of my thoughts on how to discover & live a Life with Passion. In no particular order…….

1. Take the time to learn what is really important to you…….I mean really important. This requires serious introspection. This may take time however it is seriously worth it!…..look at your Beliefs, are they serving you, are they ‘out of date’?…..your Values, what are they, are you living them? Only after you have questioned & evaluated your Values & Beliefs can you begin the path to what is really important in your Life.

2. Have a sense of Direction…….. where are you going with your Life?…This can be a follow on to the previous point. Are you at the mercy of others, their needs, their wishes. Is the pathway blurred Or is the pathway clear of major obstacles and ready for you to navigate toward your end goals? The latter is more desirable, you need to know where you are going, what you want to achieve and it needs to be your journey……no ‘excess’ baggage please, no pleasing others though this may turn into a by product of your successful journey. It’s got to be you in the first instance.

Start with a broad perspective. Allow for ‘detours’ which may uncover some marvellous opportunities not previously thought of. You can then ‘narrow down’  your discoveries to  form your  most desirable outcomes as your journey unfolds.

3. Having meaningful goals……..not any goals but goals with passion, with substance, with bite. Goals that will set you alight, will make your heart sing, will add substance to your life, your existence, your legacy. Drill down to your core, what really matters to you? Set the bar to the max, stretch yourself, add some real meaning to your Life.

4. Your Thoughts must be Positive………your thoughts determine your actions therefore your outcomes. We are always thinking, believe it or not. Everything you are currently doing, will do today, this week are determined by your thoughts. So why not think positively, think for the good, it will change your Life…..try it.

5. Be Yourself……. sounds pretty basic doesn’t it? However realising and being You and only you sets you on the right path. Forget comparisons, you are your own benchmark. By all means learn from others, that’s sensible. However you can’t be others, you can only be You. And aim to be the best You that you can be.

6.  Imagination………….without it you have restrictions, With it you have freedom. Freedom to choose your path, freedom from mediocrity, freedom to be great! There are no boundaries to your Imagination & there are no rules, be wild.

“Imagination is greater then knowledge.” Albert Einstein.…use your imagination to create a life with no limits but with endless joy.

I imagine a world with happy, smiling people…..what do you Imagine?

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

check out my new Virtual Coach page here

I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

Related articles

• 21 Simple Ways to Live an Exceptional Life (dumblittleman.com)
• Are you in the Flow or is Life just a trickle? (personalpower4me.wordpress.com)

Who moved the Goal Posts?

Have you ever been on track with a task or goal and found that just when you thought you were finished, the rules were changed? OR should I say how many times has this happened to you?

Have you been the culprit? You’ve set yourself a Goal & changed the rules for whatever reason…….made it easier, gave up, too hard?

I love to reach goals. The sense of achievement is overwhelming……then something else happens…..I want more! More achievement, more satisfaction. No, that’s not strong enough. I want more exhilaration! However what happens when the Goal Posts are moved?

Firstly, who moved them…….you or some other external influence?

If it is you, then the good news is that you can do something about it. I suggest you sit down & review your intial goal setting & determine whether it was SMART in the first place.

Yes, I know that sometimes there are “detours”...(I often get sidetracked). These are allowable provided that you keep your ‘goal posts’ in sight & don’t wander too far because the overall ‘direction’ stll has to be maintained. You still need to focus to a high degree on the “SMART’s” if you want to achieve meaningful goals.

However, if an ‘external influence/s’ is the cause, deeper introspection is required. Why has this been allowed to happen? What external influences or factors are in play here? Are they other people, lack of support, particular events happening in your life or to those around you?

But more importantly, are they within my control?….If “yes”, reset your path(revisiting the SMART principle would be good) and move forward.

If “no”, reset, learn and move forward anyway. There are more goals to achieve and you need to maintain your momentum. There’s always a lesson to be learned and there are always some things that will be outside your control. Maybe next time you will be more the wiser when faced with an ‘external factor’ trying to move your Goal Posts……and if you are the culprit, then play it SMART.

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s  Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

I also hang out @www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

Attribution: Photo copyright Rich Tea http://www.geograph.org.uk/profile/4180

The Power and the Passion

Image by kelsey_lovefusionphoto via Flickr

Or should I say…..’The Power of your Passion’

You see without true passion, your Life lacks power, punch, motivation. If you want a passionate Life you must want to get out of bed in the morning. You must want to embrace each & every day .

It’s the ‘passion’ that keeps me going. I have my ups & downs like many. However when I have my ‘flat times’, I think with passion. This kicks my motivation in to gear and action occurs.

Is it the correct action? Sometimes ‘Yes’ & sometimes ‘No’, however action nonetheless. Passion gets you moving, it’s up to you in which direction.

What is Passion? To me it’s many things………..

• It’s the tingling of my senses, an awakening if you like
• the ‘magic’ of being fully alive, a feeling of extreme vitality
• the need to express myself, immediately
• a sense of invincibility, nothing will stand in my way
• friendship, love, guilt
• achievement
• guaranteed success
• sharing & caring
• wanting to live forever

As I said in a recent Facebook post….”Life without passion is like Coke without the fizz…..c’mon live it up”

Passion is your power, your very own personal power. Find your passion in Life, it can be one or many things. When you find it, embrace it and take action……. and don’t forget to share your passion with those still struggling to find theirs. The more passionate people creates a more passionate world.

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s  Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

I also hang out  @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

Related Articles

• An inner urge that moves… (motivatorator.wordpress.com)
• Vision + Passion = Superior Results (conxentric.com)

Imagine what’s out there….. it could be a Life without Mediocrity!

I originally posted about “Mediocrity” a few months back, it was one of my earliest posts. Rising above the mediocre is one of my pet subjects so I thought I would re produce the post however with some alteration. Hope you enjoy………
Who wants to be mediocre? Mediocrity is the enemy of greatness yet mediocrity abounds in our daily lives. People want to “fit in, be one of the crowd”, people in general do not want to stand out, be extraordinary, be conspicuous, be great.

Being one of the crowd may have some merit for those who have previously felt isolated, lonely, lack self-esteem. However this is no excuse for the vast majority of us who should know better but seem intent on “just getting through the day”, “making no waves” and all the similar excuses that go with this – classic mediocrity.

That being said, how do we break free of our mediocrity? – We can start by making conscious choices to do so…….. aim higher, raise the bar, dream a little OR a lot, visualise a life, your life that is greater than now.

We can choose to think differently and use our imagination to look at our world through a different set of eyes. Ask yourself, What can I achieve? What if I said “yes I can not no I can’t?”  Imagination converted in to action opens up a lot of  possibilities  i.e the “what if’s” , ‘What could be’s”…….Convert those new found possibilities into probabilities, place the odds back in to your favour.

Einstein said ”Imagination is greater than knowledge”. Use your imagination to create a better life for yourself. Open up your thoughts, take action and release the average and introduce the greatness in your life – let go of the mediocrity.

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s  Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au

7 more Thoughts to start helping you break your Rut

As I have mentioned previously, Ruts are nasty things that block your personal growth.

You may also wish to view my recent post on Rut breaking thoughts.

Again in no particular order……………….

• Read an inspiring Book

• Take a walk, jog, bike ride

• Dream a little …..or a lot……Visualise where you want to be in 5,10 years from now

• Commence action relating to your visualisation and get excited about it and how it will change your Life

• Tell people about your (new) future and how enjoyable it is going to be for you

• Wear a funny hat for a day,  smile a lot (you can’t be unhappy when you smile)

• Seek the counsel of a close friend, helping professional, Life Coach

As Always,

Be good to yourselves

David

p.s  Feel free to view & “like” my Facebook page over there, if you like

I also hang out @ www.davidstevenslifecoach.com.au